Relief Society Lesson 1/6/08

It took me a long time to decide what the Relief Society's message should be for this month. In searching for something that I could really identify with, I came across two talks by President Hinckley. One entitled "Slow to Anger" he gave at the Priesthood session. It's awesome.


The second message is the First Presidency Message from December entitled "These Our Little Ones".

Both messages really fit together nicely. I've included my notes for the lesson. Maybe it will be interesting, maybe not. I learned a lot from it and realized that I have a lot of work to do.

Please don’t raise your hand. How many of you got angry over the holidays? How many of you said something or behaved in a way that you wish you could take back?

Introduce Talks: Slow to Anger October Conference/These Our Little Ones December Presidency Message-President Hinckley.

Proverbs 16:32 “He that is slow to anger is better than the mighty; and he that ruleth his spirit than he that taketh a city.”

It is when we become angry that we get into trouble.
There were moments of offense followed by years of regret.

Share story about the switchman. #1

Ecclesiastes 7:9 Be not hasty in thy spirit to be angry; for anger resteth in the bosom of fools.”

What do you think that means? “…anger resteth in the bosom of fools”

Anger is the mother of a whole brood of evil actions.

President Hinckley also talked about divorce being the bitter fruit of anger. “More than half the Americans who might have celebrated their 25th wedding anniversaries since 2000 were divorced, separated, or widowed before reaching that milestone.” (Deseret Morning News)

Then little inconsequential activities lead to criticism. Little flaws are magnified into great torrents of faultfinding;

President Hinckley was married for 67 years and has no recollection of having a quarrel with his wife. She constantly pleaded for the exercise of restraint, kindness and love

How do we exercise restraint, kindness and love?

So many of us make a great fuss of matters of small consequence. We are so easily offended. Happy is the man (or woman) who can brush aside the offending remarks of another and go on his way.

Grudges, if left to fester, can become serious maladies.
In the presidency message he states, “It is so obvious that the great good and the terrible evil in the world today are the sweet and the bitter fruits of the rearing of yesterday’s children. As we train a new generation, so will the world be in a few years. If you are worried about the future, then look to the upbringing of your children. Wisely did the writer of Proverbs declare, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it” (Proverbs 22:6).
E. T. Sullivan once wrote these interesting words: “When God wants a great work done in the world or a great wrong righted, he goes about it in a very unusual way. He doesn’t stir up his earthquakes or send forth his thunderbolts. Instead, he has a helpless baby born, perhaps in a simple home and of some obscure mother. And then God puts the idea into the mother’s heart, and she puts it into the baby’s mind. And then God waits. The greatest forces in the world are not the earthquakes and the thunderbolts. The greatest forces in the world are babies.”1
And those babies, I should like to add, will become forces for good or ill, depending in large measure on how they are reared. The Lord, without equivocation, has declared, “I have commanded you to bring up your children in light and truth” (D&C 93:40).
1) love them, (2) teach them, (3) respect them, and (4) pray with them and for them.
How fortunate, how blessed is the child who feels the affection of his or her parents.
President Hinckley goes on to talk about a man that he actually detested. Because he whipped his children with strap or stick or whatever came to hand as his vicious anger flared on the slightest provocation. I have since discovered that the man I disliked was one of that very substantial body of parents who seem incapable of anything but harshness toward those for whose coming into the world they are responsible.
I wish to say only that no one who is a professed follower of Christ and no one who is a professed member of this Church can engage in such practices without offending God and repudiating the teachings of His Son. It was Jesus Himself who, while holding before us the example of the purity and innocence of children, declared, “Whoso shall offend one of these little ones … , it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea” (Matthew 18:6). Could there be a stronger denunciation of those who abuse children than these words spoken by the Savior of mankind?
I would like to add that verbal abuse should be included. Verbal abuse can do just as much damage as physical abuse. In my experience, every time someone has yelled at me it felt like I had been punched in the gut, the words had such and impact. But unlike a punch the wounds didn’t heal. It was something that truly injured my soul. Elder Holland talked about the impact of our words in an excellent talk at the 2007 April Conference. It didn’t always come in the form of yelling either. Unnecessary critical comments can hurt just as much.
Share personal experiences of nose and rear.
I’ve talked about what we shouldn’t do. Now how should we rear our children?
Bring up your children in the love and fear of the Lord; study their dispositions and their temperaments, and deal with them accordingly, never allowing yourself to correct them in the heat of passion; teach them to love you rather than to fear you.”3
Of course, there is need for discipline with families. But discipline with severity, discipline with cruelty, inevitably leads not to correction but rather to resentment and bitterness. It cures nothing and only aggravates the problem. It is self-defeating. The Lord, in setting forth the spirit of governance in His Church, has also set forth the spirit of governance in the home in these great words of revelation:
“No power or influence can or ought to be maintained … , only by persuasion, by long-suffering, by gentleness and meekness, and by love unfeigned; …
“Reproving betimes with sharpness, when moved upon by the Holy Ghost; and then showing forth afterwards an increase of love toward him whom thou hast reproved, lest he esteem thee to be his enemy;
your example will do more than anything else in impressing upon their minds a pattern of life.
Nor let us ever forget the need to respect these, our little ones. Under the revealed word of the Lord, we know they are children of God as we are children of God, deserving of that respect which comes of knowledge of that eternal principle. In fact, the Lord made it clear that unless we develop in our own lives that purity, that lack of guile, that innocence of evil, we cannot enter into His presence. Declared He, “Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven”
How can we show respect to our children?
Behold your little ones. Pray with them. Pray for them and bless them. The world into which they are moving is a complex and difficult world. They will run into heavy seas of adversity. They will need all the strength and all the faith you can give them while they are yet near you. And they will also need a greater strength which comes of a higher power. They must do more than go along with what they find. They must lift the world, and the only levers they will have are the example of their own lives and the powers of persuasion that will come of their testimonies and their knowledge of the things of God. They will need the help of the Lord. While they are young, pray with them that they may come to know that source of strength which shall then always be available in every hour of need.

May I return again to the words of Brigham Young: “Let it be your constant care that the children that God has so kindly given you are taught in their early youth the importance of the oracles of God, and the beauty of the principles of our holy religion, that when they grow to the years of man and womanhood they may always cherish a tender regard for them and never forsake the truth.”

I'm so thankful for the little one that Heavenly Father gave to us and strive every day to be a better person and mom. Hopefully with taking this message to heart, I can continually strive to be more Christlike.

Thanks for reading. Any comments...thoughts?